Emo post, ignore ignore.

First, you cancelled the reunion with your side of the family.
Have you ever thought about how WE would feel?
We were looking forward to the reunion because we only see them one fking time a year and we didn't see them last year, so all the more we should go this year right?
But nooooooooooo, you CANCELLED IT.
Just because you hate them, they're bad people blahblahblah.
I agree that they shouldn't have done that luh, but they're still your family right?
You don't even have the courage to face them and you can still shout at us?
What if one day something happens to someone, then we'll never be able to see them again, EVER.
We haven't seen our relatives for 2 years alrd wth you want us to do?
Pretend that we have no relatives?
Pretend that everything's fine?
It's not going to happen, why can't you just talk things out with them?
Now you're depriving us all from having a good chinese new year.
Can this even be called chinese new year anymore?
You tell me and my sister not to send you to old folk's home when you become older or something, but you're doing it to your own father.
Although it's also your siblings' faults but he's YOUR father too, so stop complaining about taking care of him unless you want me to do that to you next time?
I don't think so right.
And you say you care for me? I think you're just saying it so you look like a good person.
I can tell you really dgaf, so stop trying and pretending.
I have coughing fits, i have this before so i have experience okay.
When i cough this much, i need to eat strepsils, which is what i'm doing right now.
So why are you forcing me to drink water?
This has happened to me before, when i drink cold or hot water it doesn't stop the coughing.
You haven't had coughing fits as bad as this before okay so don't act like you know everything just because you're older than me or whatever.
And you said that you would ignore me from now onwards, but you're still giving me shit advice that i don't need.
I can handle myself ok i'm not 1 years old anymore -.-

Ok done ranting.
3rd and 4th Feb is just a 2-day school holiday, it's not chinese new year. :)

Went out with parents to Causeway Point today.
I'm feeling much better. :)
Had lunch @ Ajisen Ramen then went around searching for clothes to buy!
Shopping really helps to cheer someone up.
Bought some stuff for CottonOn, need one more tee though~
Gonna go out to shop again soon, hopefully before CNY.
Yupp CNY is coming whoooo, ANTICIPATION.
Yay it's the year of the rabbit!

Oh and it keeps raining nowadays, morning afternoon night.
WHY. I thought the rainy season over alrd walaooooz.
SO COLD. Rain makes me feel sad too haha but it's good for sleeping!
So bored right noww.
Aww i wanna go back to Raffles on Wednesday but school ends too late and so many friends cannot come oh shitz and i can't contact some of them.

Nvm hopefully it'll work out. :D

Ordered a new bag from a blogshop, yay can't wait.

What's wrong with being tired once in awhile?
You don't have to tell everyone that we're creating trouble right.
This shows that you completely don't understand.

Thought today would be a good day,
I was wrong.
Felt totally horrible the whole day.
Redcross, thought we were gonna do footdrill, in the end did some evac stuff instead, super sian.
Had to run 2 rounds of the basketball court for punishment,
Somemore it's the first sort of official training for the sec ones.
If they quit, it's not our fault ok.
Got a sore throat, feel like puking.
My earphones spoilt AGAIN.
And to top it off, i have a headache now.
At least there's no school tmr.


I know i'm very bad la, but you're not any better, have you even thought about anyone else's feelings?
You ask me to go, fine i go, but you just ignore me and don't let me leave when i really need to. Then what's the point of staying if there's noone there to talk to?
I'm just some extra invisible piece of thin air there, tagging along behind.
It sucks to live so far but i have no choice, so don't blame me thanks.
Next time just don't invite me out le ba, save everybody's time.

Still trying to find someone who'll understand and not insult me.
Don't think i don't know wth you're doing behind my back.
Stop ordering me around like i'm your fking slave.
I shall not reply messages tmr and maybe sunday too.
I wanna be alone.

LOL fail.

Didn't really do much today, or at least i don't seem to remember half of it.
Maybe i'm gonna have memory loss or something yay.
I only remember that i was trying not to sleep most of the time during school, andddddd.
We didn't stay in class much today, which is good! If not i long ago sleep in class alrd.
Emaths test, gonna fail it horribly.
Pei-ed Amanda in class awhile coz she had to do some action plan thing coz she's the assembly coordinator mah.
Yiling waited for us tooz.
Slacked around, boredshit.
Ate lunch in school, went off to JP rest awhile, HOME.
Dinner + drawing graphs now.
Gonna flop on my worksheets liao la.
TGIF tmr! <3
Btw, i hope you're okay and you'll manage to get through all this :)



Are you trying to help me up or are you just trying to push me down even further into the ground?
When i try to tell you something, you ignore.
When you tell me something and i don't answer for a few seconds, you get pissed with me.
Wth is this.
Btw people need space too you know, you can't expect anything.
I can't seem to trust anyone anymore.

SO TIRED TODAY.
I feel like i'm a walking zombie.
School was okay, chinese is the best lesson i think, coz 黄老师 is damn nice and funny, she makes the lessons fun coz she has a good sense of humour, not like some other teacher that i shall not mention. LOL.
Did high jump for PE, wtf damn ps coz everybody's watching, super unglam.


After school, stayed back to eat lunch in school and went to 2C to chou re nao.
The sec twos were teaching the sec ones the basic stuff for Redcross. :)
Quite fun kk.

AND my mum can never stop shouting @ me, i don't even feel like coming home any more.
If you don't give a damn about my emo shit then please don't bother to read my tiny words and start bashing me about it thanks.



For the last time, i'm not your maid so please stop asking me to do things for you and treating me like shit. I shouldn't even be helping you but i have no freaking choice do i?
Over the past years, i realised that I think i'm only alive to serve these purposes:
To be everybody's punching bag, to be everybody's maid, to be someone that everybody can insult openly and they won't get beat up, to be everybody's toy: something that can be thrown away and ignored when they get bored with it, to be everybody's piece of shit that can be ignored at one moment and suddenly wanted the other. Just because i keep helping you doesn't mean that i can be pushed around tyvm. One day i'm just going to break down and noone will even care.

Hihi ok i'm back to posting normally again.
School was normally boring, almost slept during Physics.
One day i'm going to black out during class and i won't know it!
I NEED MORE SLEEP.
I'm starting to like 3-2 more and more haha.
Can't wait for the weekends though, i wanna sleep in on Saturday.
Sports day coming in March too, hopefully got first aid duty!
K after school, went to JP with pbjs, kahkeng, kekliang and kimweng.
Ks OMG. Ate @ UmiSushi, walked around, slacked @ Burger King.
Did some hw but still got some left, tmr morning then chiong i want rest.
Suddenly i can't wait for CCA on friday, maybe coz there're new sec ones so fun~


When is everyone going to stop blaming me for everything.
Even though i make mistakes sometimes, not EVERY mistake is made by me!

Day ten:
One confession.

I really have no idea leh.
I'M ADOPTED.
No la just kidding.
Idk what confession to confess today on day ten which asks me to confess a confession.
Ok fail.
Nvm skipskip. K bye. :)

I thought SPCA very nice one wor, but turns out they aren't.
They don't even want to save a dog who broke its leg and is bleeding!
What sort of service is this man.
If i manage to become a good vet next time, I definitely won't treat animals like that!
So atrocious pls.

Loads of Amaths hw today, damn sian to doooo.

Day nine:
Two smileys that describe your life right now.

1. MY FRIENDS. ♥
2. Music? :D Whenever i listen to my iPod i'll feel much much better!



Cody Simpson is Awesome.


Wtf are you expecting from me, i already tried my best.
If you have something to tell me, you could have at least told me in my face, not tell someone else instead, then how would i know wtf you want from me.

Day eight:
Three things you don't want.

1. To studyyyy.
2. To get blamed for everything i do, even when sometimes, IT'S JUST NOT MY FAULT.
3. To die young :(


Ending off with,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=smTKZTYcDCE
^^


I don't live to please you, so STFU.

Day seven:
Four things you want.

1. Happiness.
2. To do well for sec 3 and sec 4?
3. To be fearless :(
4. To meet SHINee? LOL.







Awesome Lucifer remix. :D -->
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Br_06OHut4&feature=player_embedded

Whisper of the crazy party.

Day six:
Five people who mean a lot.

1. My family.
2. PBJ.
3. KLAY.
4. TPOA.
5. ALL MY FRIENDS.

Ok actually everybody mean a lot to me, i'm grateful for all my family and friends and relatives and classmates etcetc. If i know you and you know me, you most probably mean a lot to me even if we didn't talk much before. :)



Stop threatening death to get what you want, it's really annoying and we all know you won't kill yourself. So stop forcing me to do EVERYTHING you ask me to. I have a mind of my own too, I have A LIFE thank you.

Day five:
Six things you wish you'd never done.

1. Stopped eating during recess.
2. Not coming home early to do hw. Shall start soon.
3. Being so quiet in sec one.
4. Cut my fringe, LOL.
5. Not studying hard enough.
6. (idk alrd, all i can think about is how much my stomach is hurting T_T)

Day four:
Seven things that cross your mind a lot.

1. SHINee. :)
2. Will i ever survive until poly/JC stage.
3. What's the point of living.
4. Why do i always get bullied.
5. I'm going to fail Sec 3 and 4.
6. Whywhywhy.
7. Death?

(Yah i'm actually really emo inside. Can't blame me.)


And btw stop trying to act like you care then diao-ing me.
Either you sincerely care, or you just don't care and don't say anything at all.

As salt water starts to flood my bloodshot eyes, i wonder, "Why?"

Day three:
Eight ways to win your heart.
(Ok idk how to say this but i'll just sum it up in one sentence.)

1. Be yourself, don't try to act like someone you're not.
If i like you, i like you. If i don't like you, i don't like you. :)

Day two:
Nine things about yourself.
(I shall give 10. :D)

1. I love SHINee.
2. I have random moodswings during random times.
3. I can be bitchy at times but I usually try to be nice, nobody likes a bitch!
4. I love my friends and family ttm.
5. I love Redcross but it tires me out.
6. I have nothing that i'm good at.
7. I don't like watching my friends litter. If they do, i'll pick the rubbish up and throw it away in the dustbin where it belongs. (Some of you know this alrd LOL.)
8. I hate getting bullied but i just let them do it because if i retaliate, they'll think it's fun and continue. But usually they just continue so this sucks.
9. I'm short and that's who i am, i hate people telling me over and over again that i'm short because if i'm short, so what? It doesn't mean anything, i'm still me inside.
10. I love dogs/animals. :D

Day one:
Ten people you wish to thank.

(Just a few, there are a lot more people i want to thank but i can't possibly type all here, so don't feel bad if your name isn't here, i'm still grateful! And these are not the only things i want to thanks these people for, there are more things, just that i can't think of those right now. Heh. Thanks.)

1. Mummy. :D
- First of all, thanks for giving birth to me. Without you, there'll be no me. Secondly, thanks for everything that you have done for me ever since i was born. Even though you nag and scold me a lot, i know it's for my own good, so thankyou. I love you and i always will even if i don't seem like it.

2. Daddy. :D
- Thanks for always being there for me, and helping me when i need help. Even though your temper is not very good, i still love you. All your naggings and scoldings and beatings have made me realise that i don't seem very grateful, but i really am. I just don't know how to show it. Thanks for everything.

3. Sister. :D
- You're usually horrible and selfish to me, but i still want to thank you for being there all these years. Not like you can leave or anything, but thanks for helping me with maths when i need help and thanks for talking to me when i need advice and stuff, even though you don't really help me solve them. I love you always and you know it.

4. Yiling. :D
- You're always there for me and you cheer me/people up when they're down. Thanks for helping me when i'm in need and most of all, thanks for being my friend! We're good friends even though we're in different classes, and our personalities are quite different too, so i'm really thankful that we're close friends. Thanks for tolerating all my crap and you're one of the few people who know how crazy i can become LOL! Thanks a lot Peanut! PBJs. :)

5. Amanda. :D
- Thanks for being my friend for the past 2 years, going on to 3! You've always been there and all our classes are together, i think. Thanks for helping me when i need help and thanks for hyper-ing with me at times when we're crazy. Thanks for tolerating my crap and moodswings. And, along with Yiling, you're also one of the few people who know how crazy i can become! Thanks a lot Jelly! PBJs. :)

6. Karwai. :D
- Thanks for being my friend since secondary one! Thanks for being the only one who was super nice to me during the first few days of school, i thought you were really friendly! Thanks for helping me when i need help, always being there for me, and thanks for being the mama that you've always been! Your motherly naggings and everything has helped me to remember stuff at times, so thanks! Thanks for tolerating my crap too, and you're also one of the few people who know how crazy i can become! KLAY & TPOA. :)

7. Leeshan. :D
- Thanks for talking to me on the first day of school in Jurong, you were the first person i talked to in Jurong! Thanks for helping me when i puked in school, and thanks for always being there for me, we were somehow always sitting together in class, so thanks for being my friend since secondary one! Thanks for tolerating me and my crazyness, and you're one of the few people who know how crazy i can become too! KLAY. :)

8. Kangyong. :D
- Thanks for treating me so well and being there for me when i need help. We've been in the same class since secondary one alrd, so thanks for being my friend all these years. Thanks for giving me great memories and just, thanks for everything that you've done for me. I'm really grateful but idk how to show it. Thanks a lot!

9. Kahkeng. :D
- Thanks for everything you've done for me. You know a lot of my secrets and thanks for all the good advice you give! Thanks for not spreading my secrets too. Thanks for sms-ing me and accompanying me when i'm sad or confused or worried or happy or bored. Thanks for being a good friend and i'm thankful to have a friend like you! And, thanks for suggesting all those outings which bonded us more! Also, thanks for caring, blueberry. TPOA. :)

10. Kekliang. :D
- Thanks for being a good friend and telling me some of your secrets and trusting me with them, you know some of mine too! Thanks for being so straightforward and honest and telling me things straight in my face! We've been in the same class since secondary one alrd, so thanks for being there for me and helping me when i need help. And, thanks for going SPCA with me and Vanessa Fong since we both want to become a vet. Thanks for caring!

Yah i'm still spamming SHINee.


School, Redcross, footdrill.
Found out a lot of shocking things after CCA.
Feast with pbj, kekliang and jingwen.
Harris = our pbj resting place haha.
My family is getting screwed up, hope everything goes back to normal soon.
Nothing much left to say alrd, just T. G. I. F! :)
Yay more sleep.
But more homework too.

Day One: Ten people you wish to thank.
Day Two: Nine things about yourself.
Day Three: Eight ways to win your heart.
Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot.
Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done.
Day Six: Five people who mean a lot.
Day Seven: Four things you want.
Day Eight: Three things you don't want.
Day Nine: Two smileys that describe your life right now.
Day Ten: One confession.

Gonna do this real soon. :D

Why do the nicest people have the least good friends?
I wanna make friends with you but idk how.

PBJ! :D


School today was... normal.
Pe sucked. Ran 2.4, around the school.
Expected to take height and weight today only, like all the other classes.
Failed, not surprising.
Went to mac after the agonizing hours in school dying from tiredness.
Saw NCC doing footdrill when we were waiting for 154. So sad one.
And it rained soon after and me and Yiling started singing songs while Amanda thought we were crazy HAHA.
Rested a while @ Carl's Junior, then bus-ed home. :)
Tmr will be normal again. Can't wait for the weekend.
Can't wait for Chinese New Year too!

Bleh boring day in school today.
Normal la, had ic photo taking.
Blahblah.
And maths is hard and i'm alrd starting to feel the stress omg.
Just realised that noone's there for me when i need help. They just ignore me and logoff. And the rest just rub it in my face.

CCA display day today!
I think it was very fun, pulling in random sec ones and explaining about Redcross to them,
seeing their reactions and stuff.
Karwai kept running to random people and shouting, the boys that she ran to, ran away from her like their running for their lives LMAO.
Met some sec ones who were already interested in Redcross!
So awesome, hope this year many sec ones will join~

Went home to bathe+change first, met Yiling at Jurong East.
Kekliang was supposed to meet us there too but when we reached we couldn't find him.
And his phone spoilt too, so we were spamming his house phone + his mum.
Apparently he went off after 30mins, thinking that we left without him.
Luckily he serviced his phone so when i spammed him again, he could answer haha.
Met him at Orchard, went to Taka, Far East Plaza, 313@Somerset.
Didn't really do much, just slack around.
Mrt-ed to my grandma's house after that and i became very high hahahaha.

Dental appointment tmr, okbye.
And i really hate sec 3 life. Especially the teachers.
Not looking forward to school at all.

School was okay today, slowly getting used to it already.
CCA after school was fine too, did some preparation for tmr's CCA display day.
I'm gonna be wearing full redcross uniform tmr ahhh.
Quite mafan, but honourable LOL!
Went to Long John with PBJ, Kekliang and Jingwen after CCA.
Chatted about random stuff and talked about our classes, so fun ^^
Jingwen went off after awhile.
Slacked at harris while Kekliang went to buy something.
Turns out, he bought a belated birthday present for me omg.
THANKYOU KEKKY ALOT. :D
You didn't need to buy me anything though haha, but thanks!
Now i got bluecherry!
Popular, then home after that.
Tmr after CCA display day got church event, it sounds super fun. ~
Okbye!

First day of school today.
Quite normal.
Shocking to see the sec 2 boys last year wearing long pants though.
Everyone's so tall now.

-Feels pathetic-
Listened to some discipline talks and stuff in the hall before going for first aid duty with PBJ.
We didn't know when to go coz we didn't get any leave form omg.
Turns out the leave form was with the councillors so we had to go get them then go up to the class again to give it to our form teachers.
A few sec ones fell but they weren't badly injured.
Got 'scolded' coz we didn't see someone who was supposedly injured.
We went to ask him if he was ok, he said he was ok!
And there was no cut or anything on his legs and he wasn't limping.
So yeah. Hmmm.
Chatted awhile with Kekliang, then Darren and Emran.
Fun talking to classmates again lol.
Haven't really made any new friends in 3-2 yet, hope the next few days will be better.
And there's first aid duty again tmr!
Lessons starting on Thursday, jiayou people.
Slacked in JP with PBJ after school, good to be back in JP wearing school uniform!
Passed out on the bus after that haha.
So tired la today. I couldn't sleep ytd nighttt.



Life is random so you should give me some chocolates now. Thanks. :3

SHINee's world concert has started omg.
Ok anyway, I'm blogging with my iPod now coz I forgot to blog just now when I was using the computer hahaha.

Went out with mum in the morning to get a haircut.
My hair is now a bit longer than shoulder length and my fringe is shorter!
It's kinda hard to tie up my hair now, but it's managable I guess.
School will be starting in one day.
Hope a miracle happens or something, I'm seriously not ready for school D:

The first day of school better be good!

And ppl please vote for SHINee to come to Singapore from sistic.com.sg thanks.
I want SHINee to come to Singapore! Hahaha.
And I wanna go to their concert :p
Ok thanks bye.
My arms are starting to ache!